Lacardis Prime : Twisted Woods – “Mayors and Turnips.”
Writers : SirNeroBanpaiyo & LoreleiRoseCarrendar (CharlotteCarrendar.)
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Ishmael simply rolled his eyes through the black hood. How foolish of them, the Scorpion king simply tapped his staff on to the ground, his body disintegrating into a pool of dark liquid, the said liquid started to ooze up, bubbles flowing around as the liquid started to crawl away, a good distance from them. The liquid then started to materialize, forming his body again, only this time he was wet, dripping wet. His staff glowed in an uneasy purple aura. And he slammed it to the ground again, forming an orb of protection around him. He opened his mouth, and five tongues slipped out of the hood before he spoke again “Perhaps this is not a good time…” He then aimed his staff in front of Lorelei, a blast of shadowy- like lightning heading towards her. Meanwhile, Uriel was still on his knees, glaring at the distance, waiting for people to arrive.
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – Now, all the fighting, the melee. Guards killing scorpions, and the mad monk igniting his own burps, you would think that would be a crazy enough scene, right? Wrong. The scorpion king, well, he was an incredibly shrewd dude. Dissolving into black gloop, slinking along the earth, till reaching a point away of reasonable safe distance. Then, he would reform into his true self, wearing the black robe, only this time, dripping wet from the black liquid ooze. (Lorelei)”What the hell is it with this magical black liquid? I swear it will be the end of me.”- No sooner had she uttered such words, then the Scorpion king announced to those who listened, that now was not a good time. He raised his staff, pointing it squarely at her chest, and she glanced down, only to look up straight at the being. (Lorelei)”The hell no you don’t” But yes….yes he did. He fired off a shadowy like blast, similar to lightning, that had her attempt to dive right, to be clear of its destructive path. Missing her by mere inches, it flew on by. Lorelei, landed in horse droppings. (Lorelei)”GAH…Son of a …..”-
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Ishmael grinned at Lorelei, but he raised his staff up, the shadowy glow engulfed him, slowly peeling his own skin off till he was no more. Uriel, however. Charged at him and tripped, falling on his ass. The pain made Uriel groan in pain. He placed his head back down, his eyes shut. He knew that the guards retreated or died. And there were no more scorpions, after a few. Uriel immediately stood, rubbing his left asscheek “By Satan what the fuck was that fucker made up of?!” Uriel glared at Lorelei, approaching her and offering his hand for support. But he knew she wouldn’t be too nice since she got a facial, and not many women likes to get facials from black men. Uriel also didn’t like the scorpion dude. He had a sense of feeling with him. And didn’t the guards shout his name? So many questions, but they all needed answers. He might not be getting it soon, but he sure as hell will try to.
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – Taking the offered hand, she rose up, then tried to scrape the horse manure off her, which fell on the ground, in clumps. (Lorelei)”Black…*brush*..liquid * wipe*…goo.”- Lorelei wasn’t entirely happy about the scorpion king’s unexpected arrival, or his blatant attack in her person. (Lorelei)”All I know is….we have a new enemy. He must have been able to gain control members of the military. But how? And better yet….why?” Yes, there were many questions, and so little clues. She turned to face her brother, who seemed to be squinting in pain. (Lorelei)”You’re hurt. I think it best I take you to see Dr Gelfling. He will know what to do. He is a few doors down this way.” -she would lead her brother, should he dare follow, to a small cottage, six houses down. A golden plaque gleamed upon the white door, and Lorelei knocked three times, before a portly man, wearing leather trousers, leather apron and fine wire glasses opened the door. (Doctor Gelfling)”Ah, Lady Carrendar. Goodness, been a touch too friendly with the horses this morning? No meaning to be rude, but….you smell as sweet as my wife’s rose bed.” –
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Uriel wasn’t that hurt, he just scraped his cheek. That much. Uriel rolled his eyes and said “Nah Lore I’m fine. Cheeks just a little-” However, he was cut off by the trotting of her sister towards a random house, with no options, Uriel stood up. Brushing his armor off the goo that scorpion man left out. As he was walking, he noticed men helping other men. Women who were impaled through the tree, children running freely across the corpses of their parents uncles and god knows what. Although seeing this before, it still brought something up his heart. Maybe sympathy? Doubtful….or so he thought. Uriel shook the thought off, they would deal with it themselves. Easily following up Lore, a man..old aged, talked about how Lorelei smelled. With a roll of his eyes he spoke “oh come on, Doc. Don’t be angry at your wife cause you can’t do some of this.” Once more, Uriel made his waist gesture, pumping backwards and forwards. But nonetheless, waited for Lorelei before she gone in.
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – The good doctor gave a belly laugh at the wise Uriel’s quip. (Doctor Gelfling)”You really don’t know my wife.”- Lorelei was looking slightly peeved, not all that happy being compared to a rose garden bed. Not the nicest of compliments. She placed her hands on her hips and then jerked her head towards her brother. (Lorelei)”He just took on the black and foul Scorpion king. I think he needs a good looking over. Mhm…say a prostate test. You know, the one where you snap on the gloves and go in rectally.” -she gave her brother a winning smile. (Lorelei)”I’ll…just be outside then.”- The doctor made a gruff grumbling sound and turned around to snap on his gloves. (Doctor Gelfling)”Lube or no?”-
SirNeroBanpaiyo: What the fuck? Uriel raised an eyebrow at Lorelei before speaking “Uh…no th-” But of course, not daring to interrupt Lorelei, he just let it sink in that he was going to lose his backdoor virginity. Uriel, however. Gave Lorelei a glare when she walked out and glared at the doctor, rolling his eyes at his comments “Lube? Those are for pussy. Give me that finger of yours..” And he kicked the door shut, closing his eyes and waiting for the worse to happen, and reality sunk in that he was losing his gay virginity and it wasn’t in a good way. He let out a whimper, slowly taking his pants off and bending over before he shivered. Why would she even do that? Did she want to get back at him from quipping the doctor? Or maybe she just wanted to see people suffer. In anyway, Uriel waited for the worse, the wind slapping against his ass.
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – On the outside of the tiny cottage, Lorelei leant back against the exterior wall and had a good old chuckle. Sure, she was a bitch, but that was her reputation and one she was more than happy to uphold. Inside the Doctor was slightly uncomfortable about performing the procedure, and shrugged at the mention of no lube. (Doctor Gelfling)”A brave..*sqealch*…man you are…Just..*squealch*…hold still…almost there…You are taking this like a man. ~POP!~ And done” – snaps off the gloves and tosses them, making notes on his book. (Doctor Gelfling)”You seem as fit as a fiddle lad, no idea why Lady Carrendar sent you here. Now, here is a lollypop, for being such a good patient, and come back in six months.” He would hand over the pink lolly favour on a stick, then make his way to his desk to finish his notes.-
SirNeroBanpaiyo: “YES YES YES YES YES!” Uriel was screaming over the house, he was thrusting his waist back at the doctor’s hand, not in pain but in actual pleasure. Not that it didn’t disgust him. Uriel just kept doing it. After a while, the doctor was done and he immediately pulled his armored pants up. Glaring at the doctor and snapping the lollipop from his hand. Before he ripped it open with his tooth and stuck it in his mouth. Uriel immediately ran towards Lorelei glaring at her “ Thank’s sis. I love you.” Uriel rolled his eyes, walking away. Knowing Lorelei would follow anyway. And if she did, she would’ve heard what he said “So, who’ll take care of the town now? The mayor’s gone and that fucker Xenos is also gone, where is he anyways?” Uriel asked, smiling at the children who cried. Bad choice, actually. The medics were there and he finally spoke up “Need more guards, and shit.”
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – Following behind her brother, she was tapping her bottom lip with a sharpened black claw. (Lorelei)”You do have a point. No Mayor, unruly townsfolk. Definitely need whipping into shape. I know. YOU can be the new town Mayor, and YOU would get not only his land, but his entitlements, and…a healthy retirement plan. Dental too, if you really want it. What do you say?”- she ran up and rounded on him, knowing full well, he would find such a tempting offer, hard to resist.-
SirNeroBanpaiyo: What? Him? Mayor? Or something? Uriel gaped at her…but he kept his school. No need to whimper like a girl and smile. Uriel pretended to think for a minute, casualties , the land, the bitches. The awesome horses. Uriel finally sighed, it was a huge responsibility but…still, Uriel smiled ‘Kay, just to help you out.” He rolled his eyes before speaking “When do I start? Tomorrow?” Uriel knew he’d be sitting on his desk again, being all-mighty and like with the bitches. But hopefully he won’t fuck this up and he’ll actually be a good leader…Like Lorelei was, yes. He’d use her as an example. He needed to be like Lorelei, good and mighty. But still ruthless, that’s how he described her.
LoreleiRoseCarrendar:- That smile, that glimmer of teeth sparkling. Oh yes, the wheels in his mind turning with the endless possibilities for fortune and personal gain could be more than he hoped to have made by some simple acquisition. Course, he was keeping chuff, his acceptance, and behind her back she held her fingers crossed, knowing that if she made it tempting enough, he may well take a bite out of the preverbeal apple offered in the shape of mayordom. (Lorelei)”Why wait? Why not get comfy in his digs now? Enjoy his stables, dine at the club he inhabits with those ghastly cohorts of his. Smoke his cigars…Hell…shag his wife!”-she bit her lip as she knew he was going to find this one very tempting offer. (Lorelei)”Then….you and I can discuss this….Scorpion fellow and how to rid ourselves of him, once and for all…okay?”-
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Uriel felt something uneerie with Lorelei…something different. She wouldn’t think of blindsiding him, no, of course not. Uriel loved her like his real sister! That would be just ridiculous…..but she just given away his ass virginity. So he didn’t completely trust her. Uriel shrugged “Err, yeah. The scorpion person and he just pointed at her house “Let’s rest first, that was one fuck up I’m never going to forget..” Uriel however, was actually polite and let her go in first. He turned around, still examining the damage…people dead, casualties.. what else? Children to feed..how would he manage all this? Well, he better get his learning scope out and start to research cause there was no backing out. Plus the mayor’s wife was hot. So, why not, right? She wouldn’t wish him bad..
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – Okay, she almost had him in the woven web of words she so carefully constructed, but like that annoying little fly that got lucky, he eased himself out of harms way with the careful tip toeing around acceptance of such a posting so readily. (Lorelei)”Well….choice is yours of course, dear brother of mine.”- she trotted back to her house, up the stairs, turned the door handle and strode on in. Walking over to a bookcase, she hummed quietly to herself as she let her fingers walk or should I say crawl over the spines of the brightly coloured tomes. She would clearly hear his footsteps come along after her. It was his suggestion they go back to her house, and not the mayor’s digs, so he could take not only the rights to the dwelling, but the rights to the mayor’s bed and associated things, like his wife. The large grandfather clock would tick tock, as though making the whole day go much slower. For when watches clocks, time seems to be on show, and slows down. It is when we dream the day away, that we lose track of time, and wonder where it went. –
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Uriel followed her, still weary of what she would do. His footstep clanged onto the wooden floor. He smelled something fishy “Brother dear” No, that wasn’t Lorelei at all! But he wasn’t protesting. With power comes responsibility and sacrifice. So he immediately stood up, following her and speaking “Okay my dearest peachy sister .I will come and save this town from the grasp of those poisonous scorpions!” but he made it believable of course. Uriel sat down and said “ I shall become the mayor of Twisted Woods, and up come the rising of this town!” He strutted at the window and pointed at the random part of the forest “There will be your monument.” Uriel chuckled again, as if he was expecting everything then he spoke “So, I’ll go to the office tomorrow! I can’t wait for the interview!”
LoreleiRoseCarrendar: – Her fingers came to stop on the book called “War and Peace” Mhm what a place to rest her fingertips, as her brother did follow her in and stated in a very loud and firm voice. “Okay my dearest peachy sister .I will come and save this town from the grasp of those poisonous scorpions!” Win. She lowered her hand from the book and then tilted her head, her face the image of one that had just swallowed the canary. (Lorelei)”You won’t regret it. And think of it this way. WE get to spend more time together.”- She sidled over and sat on the edge of the large chair, the velvet so comfortable. (Lorelei)”Spoken like a true politician. I knew you had it in you.”- she attempts to playfully punch his shoulder, but he rises up and struts to the window, pointing out to some random spot in the forest green. “Tommorow is….another day. Let us celebrate by a fine meal prepared by the fabulous Baldrick. How do you feel about turnips?” –
SirNeroBanpaiyo: Uriel smiled at her sister and nodded “like sister like brother my dearest.” And he walked towards her, still weary of what would happen. “Yes…..That sounds….good, Turnips.”